How to Be Independent

Being independent is a vital skill for people who want to take more control of their lives and feel like they don't need others to accomplish their goals. Being more independent will give you the freedom to do what you want without caring what others think and it will also lead you to find some original solutions to your problems. Plus, studies show that the more independent a person is, the happier he/she feels! This is because we feel a sense of relief and joy when we can take our lives into our own hands.

Part1
Thinking Independently

  1. 1
    Accept yourself. You cannot build a strong, independent you if you can't live with yourself. Accept your body, your personality, your opinions, your choices, your preferences, and your life story. Do not say things against yourself. Everyone can be strong enough. Everyone has put up with something, proving their strength. Put behind you your mistakes and learn from them. Make an effort to be a better you and most importantly love yourself.
    • This is an important part of being independent because accepting who you are will keep you from trying to act like someone else.
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    2
    Believe in yourself. If you don't believe in yourself then who else will ? We are all different and have something unique to say. No one can speak the words on your lips and not everyone is going to agree with what you say which is why it's important for you to stand by who you are because at the end of the day you are all you got and if you believe in yourself that's really all that matters. Believing in yourself will make you trust your own decisions -- even if they completely go against someone else's -- or even society's -- expectations.
    • If you don't have faith in yourself, you will always second guess yourself and turn to others for help every time you have to make a decision. Step away from that.
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    3
    Accept the world. Independent people are not vain, nor do they believe the entire human race is cruel. Independent people are those who see the world, with its good and its bad, and consciously choose to be strong for themselves and others. You are not independent because you do not trust anyone. You are not independent because you think highly of yourself. Follow this guideline: Learn to accept the world, and decide to be strong.
    • Accepting the world and all of its complications will also help you see that there are an infinite number of ways to live out there -- nobody is forcing you to conform to one of them.
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    4
    Be emotionally independent. Chances are, you depend on many people for emotional support. It may be your parents, a boy or girl friend, or good close friends. Although it is possible to continue to depend on these people for the rest of your life, it is in your best interest to realize that everyone in your life that you depend on will one day no longer be around. Some will move away, some will stop talking to you, and they all will eventually die. The only person that will always be with you is you. If you depend on yourself for support, you will never be let down.
    • It's okay to get attached to a few key people in your life, but you cannot let these people determine your level of happiness. That's up to you.
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    5
    Be self-motivated. Other people do not have and will never have the same vested interest in your success. Motivation and success is a function of habit. You must break your bad habit of procrastination, and replace it with one of good planning. The most successful people in the world aren't always the brightest, or the best looking, but no matter what other talents or gifts they have been blessed with, they have underpinning their self esteem a series of victories over tasks both large and small. This is how you learn anything in school, gain confidence dating, and everything else in life.
    • If you want to achieve a career goal, it should be to please yourself, not to please your family. If you want to get amazing grades, then the same thing is true.
    • Don't be motivated to lose weight, publish a book, or build a house just to impress others. Do it because you want to drive yourself to succeed. Do it for yourself.
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    6
    Be your own hero. A role model can help inspire you and show you how to live your life. It's not a bad thing to find someone you deeply admire who shares your values. However, at the end of the day, it's important to think of yourself as your own role model, as a person who is capable of doing and saying anything he or she wants. Aim to be yourself, and be the best you can be. If you can't look up to yourself, you can't be independent.
    • Avoid idolizing any friends or acquaintances in your social circle. This will only make you even more likely to forget about doing your own thing.
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    7
    Accept that life is not fair. Our parents cared for us so much that they did everything in their power to raise us in a fair and just environment. The real world does not function on that principle which is a big problem today. The rules in the world usually protect either the majority (which you may not be a part of) or people with money and power. You will be treated badly for all sorts of unfair things: your skin color, your intelligence, your height, your weight, how much money you have, your opinions, your gender, and just about everything else that makes you who you are. You have to be happy in spite of that.
    • Don't let the unfairness of the world keep you from doing what you want to do. Want to be a male nurse? A female in the military? The first person in your family to graduate from college? Go for it instead of convincing yourself that it's just not possible in the world you live in today.
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    8
    Stop caring about what other people think. This is the most important thing about being independent. If you depend on others to tell you if your music is cool, or if your outfit is cute, you won't be very happy! As long as you like it - nothing else matters! Stop worrying about other people's judgments about your life, whether they are thinking about your clothes, your choice of career, or your choice of significant other. These are your decisions, and not anyone else's.
    • If you always have the nagging thought, "But what will other people think if..." in the back of your head, then you'll always be holding yourself back from doing your own thing.
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    9
    Don't just think that you're the best; prove it to yourself! Your opinion matters the most in your own motivation, but you know when you're pulling your own weight as to your accomplishments. It's far easier to just start dealing with your responsibilities knowing, with an incredibly strong faith in yourself that you can handle what comes up because you have before, than trying to accomplish goals because you're all warm and fuzzy inside. Warm and fuzzy accomplishes very little, but neither does beating yourself up.
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    10
    Get your own information. Watch and read the news and make sure you get it from a variety of sources. Follow it as often as you can and always have a goal of getting both sides of every story before forming an opinion. You can talk to people of a variety of backgrounds to get more information on a relevant topic, too, but never let other people tell you what to think. Make a goal of reading as much as possible, whether you're reading literature or The New York Times. Being well-informed will keep you from being a follower and will lead to more independent thought.
    • You don't want to be a lemming and to believe something just because your 50 closest Facebook friends tell you to.

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2 Comments

Anonymous said…
NICE ONE
babygirl said…
Thank u